Anyerism!
Featuring a representive gathering of all Mythical Entities in the
collective human psyche to once and forever resolve the Catholic /
Protestant problem of which all agree is a collective responsibility
they all have been slacking on.
Dedications
This play, whatever final forms it manifests, is a tardy graduation
present to Ms Vicki H, for her 20 Calations reunion. “I didn’t know
you until very recently” being the extenuating circumstances for it’s
tardy (still better than n ever) presentation. Ms Vicki is also
credited for re- awkening childhood memories that I actually did
theater at a fairly early age such I forgot about those experiences
and only with those flashbacks could I realize this was meant to be a
play. The Titanic sequence was also her inspiration.
Dramatis Personna
1. Guy – having a near death experience where his head is used as a
venue for a gathering of mythical beings during an anyerism surgery.
This is adrogynous role and could even be a male female dual role ( 2
actors).
2. Medical Droid – to perform operation and narrarate some required
info to connect audience to situation. Ian Banks Culture type droid.
3. Trinity of Mythical Entities – first approach and ask guy for
permission to. Rent his head for the gathering.
4. Mythical Entities gathered to resolve the Catholic Protestant
issue. These are composites of characters found in kids stories from
all different cultures: talking animals with magic powers mostly.
5. Goat – propses Buddhism solution
6. Pisces – seconds the motion
7. Speaker for group – warns about getting involved. An elephant in
many morphing transmogs but flashing to a recurring blind men
(attempting describing an elephant based on what part they are
touching) to show how everyone can be correct in a sense despite
contrary language. An elephant is like a tree the one touching the
leg exclaims, no a wall says the one holding a side. A snake says one
holding tail. One blind man stuck his hand in dung and remarks ”
Odd I’d have to say an elephant is kinda soft and mushy the way it
feels to me.
Act I – the venue is chosen
Opening on a crowded transit terminal broken by the shout “anyerism!
Everyone stand aside”. The crowd parts to reveal a medical ‘droid
zooming in to assist someone having a brain anyerism along with
narraration describing the medical procedure (used today). Droid does
a soliloquy that equates to searching it’s memory banks for all data
relating
“the main problem is the blood pressure which makes plugging a hole in
delicate capillaries in your brain a tad difficult; and standard
procedure solves this problem by rendering the patient clinically dead
for 10 minutes so no bloodflow will take place. The anyerism is sealed
and fixed and patient is revived via CPR”
The droid tells the guy this is your only option over a fatal brain
hemmorage and need your permission to go ahead – and the guy says go
for it. What else is one to do under the circumstances?
The droid preps and begins the standstill operation which involves
cooling body temp and inducing cardiac arrest to stop bloodflow. (I
can go into the gory details if it helps). TMI droid…
Fade to black – almost the guy is lying clinically dead while droid is
sealing anyerism.
Before total fade, up come 3 lights which are a trinity of Mythical
Entities making guy an offer. Since he’s clinically dead they want to
rent his head to hold their gathering and as age old tradition offer
guy that in return (for the use of his head) they grant his full
recovery and to recall the experience if desired or have it permanent
wiped before he regains consciousness. Of course he says yes: “so
this means I recover and go on as if nothing happened?”
“only with the memory of what happens with us, which you are free to
do with as you choose including the option to have it wiped for good”
Do I need to think that over?
Dude! no fine print is there?
Deal!
Venue is decided. AThe guys head while clinically dead during an
anyerism surgery.
Act ii – the gathering begins
And light changes to reveal each Mythical Entity present and
introduces self to the group. They all thank the guy for allowing the
group to use his head while he is having a Near Death E xperience as
such is the only way these matters can be done – one of those
conditions for tangible manifestation on this plane ya know…
The elephant is obviously chosen speaker for the group and is used to
convey additional explanations to the audience as need be.
The problem is presented as one Entity recalls an Irishmsn’s
definition of (paraphrase of a real quote) “Ireland = 200 sq miles
inhabited by two groups of people who speak the same language,
worship essentially the same god whose command is “thou shalt not
kill” and use the fact they have different names for minor bits as an
excuse to blow each others brains out whenever convenient; and commit
any other atrocity desired against the other group of people.”
All Mythical Entities agree to fix the problem and admit they should
have done it long ago but tWas an unexpected difficulty and so we all
procrastinated until everyone decided time to fix it is long overdue….
A few more stories are told and a few QA dialogs held (as needed.)
Bottom line – No one has an answer.
From way in the back the Goat ( Chinese astrology and Capricorn of
the Zodiac morph ) says:
Why not secretly convert both sides to Buddhism, because it is silly
to argue about the differences between Catholic and Protestant
Buddhism. They just won’t be aware they converted but must of own
free will do so. Since True Nirvana only occurs at the moment of
enlightenment of ALL sentient beings it sorta makes infighting a no-no
by default does it not?
Light moves around the gathering of Entities to catch each reaction
while some whisper to one another in the background. All have s
bewildered expression “you have an interesting point but some piece is
missing”
Consensus; spoken by the Elephant in magistrate robes explains ” Goat,
that makes too much sense, it’ll never work…”
Except Pisces ( two fish connected in the middle swimming on opposed
directions, that Zodiac symbol ) who says:
Hey that’s brilliant! I second the motion!
Elephant explains now it’s been seconded we move to discussion.
Act iii debate and discussion
This act can be long or short as works best as the Entities debate how
such might transpire. Involve soliloquy and dialog between Entities.
But concludes with guy whose head is being rented saying to the effect:
Hey,
I studied Buddhism in college the key is novalist Hermann Hesse.
Act final
All entities look at guy who is in some disembodied representation and
say in unison “could you please elaborate on what you just said”
Guy explains by events in Hesse’s life and quoting his works the only
bridge between Buddhism and the Western mindset is through Hesse. The
only way you can secretly convert both sides to Buddhism by free will
is through some popular rendition of his works…
Elephant now dressed in a clerk outfit warns guy:
We value your input but going further means you are now involved; this
is the point of no return are you sure you wish to procede?
Guy says Jack Dawson became involved the moment Rose ran past him;
intent on jumping off the stern of RMS Titanic – in the film anyhow,
alright so I’m involved – it is my head we are all using for this
gathering of course I’m involved.
We mean it can no longer be wiped from your memory should you choose
that option…
Did Mr Dawson request a memory wipe or did he just ‘go for it’ when
opportunity knocked?
Flash in those scenes from Titanic either re-enactment or film clips
displayed in some way the audience can grasp.
Sudden jolt as the defibrulator is applied in reality. Every entity –
“shit they have been getting much faster lately.”
Guy ” what? It’s over? No I don’t want to go this is a really cool
dream”
Entities start to fade as guy is brought back to consciousness – final
unison of all Entities ” ‘go for it’ we will help anytime we are
able”. Entities all fade away waving goodbye.
Fade to near black the bright lights instant on patient waking up
uninjured and healed thinking outloud while gently pushing away
medical droid who is fussing over him “My that WAS an interesting
experience – first thing I need to do is start a rock band” 🙂
Then “Steppenwolf got taken we will need a new name…”
=)
The End